Friday, April 29, 2011

Just a quickie.

Not that kind of quickie.

I went to an acupuncturist this morning. It was a groupon purchase that I made very spontaneously a month or so ago. She is treating me for my arthritic knee and to lose weight. When she put the needles into my left elbow my right knee felt so good I could do a squat. Unbelievable. I am ready to make this work.

Then I had my guitar lesson and we played old folk tunes and that was fun.

That takes me to now, where I am killing some time waiting for the washing machine to complete a cycle. Writing to you.

We viewed Survivor last night, and the once strong team is gone or at Redemption Island. If you don't watch this show you don't care trust me. If you do watch the show you don't care either. This is the very worst season ever. At least we can get together and have a good meal and conversation.

Here some funnies from Donna, Donna from Hamburg, NY, that is.  Some of these made me feel dirty just looking at them. Do it clean and have a stellar weekend.

Jesus Jane, get a grip.
 Now don't you feel good about yourself :[ ... Carol

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Waiting for my ship to come in...

 In the meantime I am back up to the AF.

 Hope you have a superior work-week-end.

Jack is one good looking chocolate Labrador retriever. You're so good looking too. CSL

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Everything I hoped for....

that sums up last night's David Sedaris' show, or would performance or even reading be better? Hell, I guess I wished it was a little longer if I had any complaint.

I had bought the tickets back in October and gave one to my friend KJ for Christmas with dinner, drinks and the ride downtown included in the gift. Her new favorite restaurant is Nosh, so that's where we went. Everything was splendid until the restaurant started filling up and then our "small plates" started arriving slower and slower until what we would regard as our entree, the Spicy Shrimp, came about a half hour after we ordered it. Then, they were uncooked. They probably thought after the three glasses of wine and the low-lighting, we wouldn't notice, but we did and they took the shrimp off the bill and bought us a round of drinks and all was forgiven. Kind of.

We got to the show and stood in a line for a cocktail. The sole bartender they had working told us she had a fever as she made us our drinks. Hmmmm... hope it wasn't a typhoid fever or meningitis. Hepatitis, bad too. I do prefer ice scoops to hands.

Our seats were fabulous but I did notice the closer to the stage, the closer the seat proximity.

Sedaris started out reading an excerpt from his new book,  Squirrel Meets Chipmunk, about a cat getting groomed by a baboon. I was hoping that the night's reading was not entirely in support of the book, but looking back I think this was the funniest material of the evening. The baboon is hoping to find common ground with the cat as a new client. She tries to dis a dog client, revealing she hates the dog, because among other things, he licks his butt. The cat responds, "well what's so wrong with that?"

I love the readings concerning growing up with his dysfunctional family. Although our families were far from similar, there was some pretty hilarious dysfunction going on in our household. I don't know if I could make a life's work out of it. I mean come on, we didn't belong to any country club not even the cheap one.

There was one reading about waiting in line for coffee at a hotel coffee shop with some pesky tourists with lots of time on their hands, chit-chatting with the barista, as he frustratingly waits to order a regular cup of coffee, only to find out they don't sell regular coffee. We've all been behind them at the coffee shop - the Munford's, ordering huge complicated flavored coffee drinks. This is a prime example of how he can turn a typical situation into a reading that people are all but pissing their pants laughing so hard. Such talent.

We had a night-cap at MacKenzies and it was a wonderful evening.

I did drop in on the neighborhood gathering but they were done, I did drink a shorty while Noel picked up.

Earlier this week, we watched Survivor. It has gotten so fucked with Rob there that it is really no fun to watch anymore. I do believe his karma will catch up with him. I will reiterate: I cannot stand reality shows who bring back stale douche-bag contestants for the notoriety and ratings.  I can no longer stick up for Phillip as he is just is a complete freak show. I can no longer give excuses for his retarded rants. Then he says he's a Buddhist. Please, a Buddhist would NEVER treat people like he does, nor steal.

Okay enough, I won a golden stool at this year's April Stool's poop pick-up at the dog park. A golden stool is a spray painted, clay, bejeweled-dog turd. I never win anything. But hey, if I am picking up dog shit I might as well win lunch somewhere. At Nosh, no less. I hope they cook the shrimp. Touche. Dog poopay.

Does it get any better than this? I think not.

I took Mags to Holey Rollers to get her a cartilage ear piercing. Never thought I'd be taking her there but I was weak after pulling an all-nighter with my son so he could finish his homework.  That's another story, I haven't done that in a long time (30 years) especially without drugs and/or alcohol. But ask me anything about Louis XIV.  Back to the tattoo parlor. I didn't feel like driving to Claire's. Mags was skeptical. But I rather give the money to a locally owned place really. Plus it was hardly scary. I know we are so edgy. But never conformists. Conformists would have gone to the mall.

Bumper stickers from the dog park...

Happy Easter, for whatever it means to you.  Carol

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Untitled Post #314

Can you believe, 314 posts? Sorry to put you through all this petty shit, but kinda fun huh?

I quit Facebook yesterday. Just temporarily, probably. My daughter said people with ADHD like me should probably limit their time on it, so I am giving it a break.  Because she seems way smarter than myself, and really the only thing I ever posted on there were photos of my damn dog, Jack , it's probably best.  Sorry for all the commas, but when in doubt, I put a comma in there. Speaking of Jack, he got really dirty at the dog park this a.m., so when we got home I started the shower and called him, and he came in the bathroom and jumped in the tub by himself. This is revolutionary. Typically, I have to lift him in the tub and wrestle him like an alligator to wash him, so that was a nice surprise.

Here's some funnies sent by my friend Ron. Places to eat with names that may, and should keep you at bay. Kinda like Chef's Salty Chocolate Ball's. Nah, I am partial to salty chocolate balls.

Happy 4/20, weed day, tomorrow. I'll light a joint  bong a candle for you. Just don't eat at Happy Crack, ok?

Monday, April 18, 2011

Paranoia, the destroyer

You know what I am talking about, The Kinks, Destroyer, doesn't that take you back thirty 'er so years.

Hey, you know how I love those foresnic shows and that show "Disappeared"? Well this RIT student was found dead next to the little upstate NY town where I went to high school. Dateline: Wayland, New York.  I wonder what happened to him. Will this be a future "Disappeared"?

I shot for the paper and photographed another athlete. A sprinter this time. Her name: GinAsia

She was awesome.  

Jack seemingly hates cat ears.

Seemingly. I know this is not right.

Anyway, another long night staying up with my son last night, making sure he gets his homework done. He was up most of the night. Good God, this morning I even lit a candle for him. One of those religious candles I light for the Broncos. 
When I was in college, I had a friend, Joey. Good friend and crazy too. His mother, whose name escapes me and doesn't really matter for the story, would light candles for him and all his friends. She knew my name and would tell Joey, "Tell Carol I am lighting a candle for her too." At the time I was thinking, "There's not enough candles on the face of this Earth to help me out, don't waste the matches." But she was a devoted Catholic and she knew about the drinking and carrying on we did. Maybe that's why we all survived it. All those candles.
 I'm not religious, just a good person who tries to do the right thing. I hope that counts for something. I will light the candles for the Broncos, my son and for you too if you want, because positive thoughts can go along way. Stay positive. I know how hard it is sometimes.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

bunch of stuff.

So there.

I am he as you are he as you are me
And we are all together
See how they run like pigs from a gun
See how they fly
I'm crying.

I am out in the garden today with a pick-axe getting all the built-up anger and angst out. I love Spring. Hope you are having an angst-free Spring day as well.

The Edward Munch's painting, The Scream: discuss.

Because you didn't come here for me to sum up my life in nonsensical Beatles's lyrics and discuss a painting by some Norwegian guy; plus you deserve as many chuckles in one day as possible here's some funnies from my friend Donna, filed under the title, "It's all in the angle" So true, enjoy.

Add caption

I would love to call any of these photos my own. Well done.